AMNESTY NOW!

The Pacific northwest has been a breeding ground for liberal lunacy for many years, so what I’m about to tell you now may not come as a surprise. We all remember the plight of the northern spotted owl in Oregon back in the early nineties, right? The poor creature had been pushed to the point of extinction by the overly aggressive development of mankind and was placed on the endangered species list. All commercial logging was halted in an area rich with timber and hundreds of jobs were lost in the local timber industry as well as an economic stagnation due to those jobs disappearing. The radical greenies and the government then set about bringing the poor bird back from the brink.

It was a cause you could really get behind and the bird soon became the symbol for the conservation movement as it railed against the never ceasing demands of human industry.

Well, fast forward to today and that majestic bird is once again under attack from an aggressive species that seeks to force it from it’s protected territory The attack isn’t coming from who you think it is though. It’s coming from another species of owl, the barred owl, that is better suited to the environment, able to nest in a wider area and has a diet that includes much that the northern spotted owl will not touch. Also, the barred owl is not a outside species introduced to the environment, it’s native to the pacific northwest area to begin with. The two species have coexisted alongside each other for hundreds of years but the barred owl proved to be the stronger of the two.

In simple terms, the barred owl is a hardier species more aptly suited to the environment and thus, is pushing the spotted owl down the evolutionary ladder and back to the brink of extinction. This is natural selection at it’s finest. This is not man encroaching on yet another defenseless animal and destroying it’s habitat, this is the way of nature. When nature selects a species for extinction, there is no Supreme Court appeal process. There is no legislation or “feel good” policy that can deny the inevitable. When you are selected for extinction, that’s it. Ask the dinosaurs how they fared in the “natural selection lawsuit”.

I read this story with gusto for two reasons. First and most importantly, it points out the folly of the green movement when it seeks to limit man’s progress for the sake of an animal that will die out anyway, and secondly because it brought to mind another issue that once again rears it’s ugly head in our pre-election season.

Immigration.

Yes, I said immigration. How do the two link you might ask? I’m glad you asked. Let me expound on my point and you will see the wisdom of this connection.

Let’s put this in terms that everyone can understand.

The barred owl just wants to come into the spotted owl’s land and raise it’s little owl family. It just wants a better way of life and besides, it’s just there to do the job the spotted owls won’t do. Why should some imaginary boundary keep the barred owl out? After all, does the spotted owl own the land in which it resides? No, I say. The earth belongs to no one species alone and I say we should immediately pass legislation providing immunity for all the barred owls so that they can stay. They’ve been there so long, they don’t know any other land. The term “anchor egg” has been bandied about by the spotted owls, racists that they are, and this must stop.

Oh yes, what are they going to do about the barred owls to further protect the spotted ones?

They’re going to hunt and KILL them for heavens sake. Thousands upon thousands of birds will be slaughtered mercilessly every year to control their breeding and encroachment. This is simply barbaric, I tell you. Look, we can’t simply deport every barred owl, that would be far too costly so I say instead that we offer amnesty and bring the noble barred owl out of the shadows. Free to pursue the American Owl dream, to live in the freest territory on Earth

Besides, it IS the backbone of the environment of the Pacific Northwest…isn’t it?